BDSM Female Domination

Over the years I have seen many excitable slaves ruin their chances with a Dom/me by exercising poor protocol in his communications. You can be very enthusiastic when discoursing with a Dom/me; that’s a good thing. You can also be over-enthusiastic; that’s very bad.

Or rather, overenthusiasm is fine up until a point. That point is simply the level at which it encroaches on the Dom/me’s comfort zone. It is a very intense and delicate world we dabble in, and even Dom/mes have hard limits. It is imperative that you never forget you are part of a two-way relationship with thoughts and feelings on both sides. Anyone who neglects my boundaries is immediately and sometimes permanently blacklisted.

Femdom BDSM

Some of the basic offenses include:

  • Over-emailing. More than a one to one ratio of emails verges on the inappropriate, unless you have a VERY CLEAR signal from your dominant that you are “friendly” and “jokey” and that casual communication is acceptable.
  • Overly long emails. Don’t say in a paragraph what you can say in one sentence.
  • Graphic Detail. Communicating to me any gratuitous details about your body, practice, sexuality or fantasies, unless solicited by me, is a surefire way to make me delete your email and/or mute you on social media.
  • Inappropriate or too much social media interaction. If you’re unsure if you’re doing too much online, you can always ask a Dom/me if you need to tone it down. He or she will most likely give you the honest answer!
  • Sexual advances. This includes overtures outside a roleplay context or inappropriately intimate requests/conduct while serving in or outside of session.
  • Demanding Intimacy as a Personal Slave. Just to be very clear, this point regards personal slaves, not clients. Steering the relationship towards anything except service-based personal slave dynamics is something that I myself despise, though there are some Dom/mes who may wish to blur the lines emotionally or physically. However, you should always be aware of your Dom/me’s feelings and expectations upfront before beginning any sort of service arrangement. Communication will help you to avoid unnecessary misunderstandings. “Contracts” of behavior and expectations between a Dom/me and slave can change, but you must honor the agreement as is until you renegotiate it.
  • Privacy Breaches. Violation of my privacy or infringement on my “real life” or private relationships is a massive red flag and is one of my hardest limits.
  • Emotional neediness. This point regards clients as well as personal slaves. In most cases (and I speak from experience) anything beyond a comfortable employer/employee standard of emotional intimacy between me and my clients starts to erode the relationship and experience. Personal slavery can be far more intimate, but it’s important to keep the nature of the relationship very clear. You can navigate in and out of “friend time” and “D/s time” but by and large it must be done so slowly and with great care if you don’t want to lose the high-voltage nature of a power exchange relationship.
  • Ineptitude. Chronic failure to complete tasks properly or in time, and/or multiple incidents of damage to my studio or property is a great way to not get asked back. There are many reasons that a person can become clumsy, ditsy or inept when in the presence of a Dom/me, so it is important to do whatever it takes to center yourself and allow yourself the privilege of serving. Self-sabotage is a silly thing, and I have seen many a slave with high potential lose out on a great relationship due to not feeling he or she deserves a quality Mistress, or that there is something inherently “wrong” with kink and thus some part of the slave does not wish to participate.
Femdom Protocol

From the gorgeous spread in W Magazine with Bruce Willis

Most of you will not fall into these traps just by design, but if you wish to serve me in the future you must ensure you do not do so out of forgetfulness or over-eagerness either. I suggest you study these tips and make sure your behavior is on point right now, with our communications so far (or your communications with other Dom/mes as the case may be).